If another female is competing for the attention of a male, you have no choice but to fight her. Preferably, to the death. It's nature's way.
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Blow him. REALLY WELL. That's what my mom told me anyways. "You want to catch a man, Josh, you best get practicing." and I was like "Mom I like girls!" and she just shook her head, and forced the banana down my throat.
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| Ok. We have to talk. First of all, I’m sure this guy is hot, but is there anything beyond that? Does he play sports? Is he part of the "popular" crowd? Does he have a posse of rowdy friends? Because let me tell you from experience, if there are no brains or human goodness behind his hottie goodness, then you’re probably better off just drooling from afar. I’m guessing that there’s nothing going on in his brain or in his heat because he’s flirting with that girl you don’t like, and if you’re a Newmoanyeah.com reader, then you must be the cool, likeable girl. And if your hottie is attracted to bitchy women, then he must be shallow and brainless. I understand though, he’s still hot and to be noticed by a hot guy is heaven. Eye candy is necessary in everyone’s life, but there’s a limit to how close you should get to it. It burns something nasty if you’re a good person. If you were ever to get him, do you really think you’d be happy? You’d be looking at him and saying, "Hey, you look great, but do you think you could say something besides 'uga bugga. Oh ug oohhhaa.' to my mom"? So, keep looking, but trust me. Let the hottie get the bitch. You’ll end up with a not-quite-so-hot but successful, exciting, kind, and romantic soul in the future. The bitch will end up being left by the hottie for a fifteen-year old cheerleader by the time she’s thirty. Trust me. I know.
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This feat requires three elements: the art of rumor spreading, attention getting, and not looking desperating.- High school is an easy place to spread news. Know that.
- Do or say something attention gettingy around his circle of friends, so that they talk about you -- hopefully around his ear area.
- Pretend you're not as interested, for people smell desperate vibes.
If it was meant to be, you'll bump into each other and he'll say something like "hey, aren't you the girl who shaved her eyebrows and then wrote 'love' and 'hate' in their place respectively?" and you will have something to talk about. To speed up the process, wave a flag around him while looking in the other direction.
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